Another Day... Another Diaper...

Hola! Mi nombre es!

Elle — Fri, 04 May 2012 19:50:14 +0000

You would think that my daughters knew Spanish being that it was my first language and I did not learn English until I was about 4 or 5 years old but nope, that isn’t the case. As much as I have tried to teach my girls how to roll their R’s, all I get is a lot of gibberish and zero Spanish coming out of their mouths. I always promised myself that my children would know Spanish but that was so much easier said than done. I bought only Spanish books when they were babies and read to them every night. I spoke to them in only Spanish but then, it all went to the wayside when it wasn’t my primary language anymore and all my daily duties consisted in me speaking English to everyone. I watch television in English, I speak to my friends in English and I speak to my husband in English and slowly but surely AND even after hiring a nanny that only spoke to the girls in Spanish, they began losing interest in the language and of course reminding me that this is America and that we should all speak English, THANK YOU FOR THAT SCHOOL!
All this until now! PBSkids rolled out a web series involving, Noah, a 9 year old who is staying with his grandmother where everyone only speaks Spanish! My girls have been playing since yesterday and are very excited to say new words! I even started a reward system where they get a star for every new Spanish word they use. They love it! You will also find a few printable actividades (like how I snuck that Spanish in there?) which my girls LOVE to do! I printed out the placemats and now when they set the table they name the item as they place it! It really is awesome and I cannot be more excited that after all these years, my girls are excited about learning Spanish. Yes, they still don’t know how to roll their R’s but baby steps right?! I highly recommend checking out this web series and playing the FREE online games that are provided.
Check it out and report back! Let me know how it goes for you and if you have any more fun tips on teaching your children a second language.

Que siga la tradición!

Elle — Fri, 04 May 2012 15:16:42 +0000

Fifteen years ago (or more, still up to debate between my mother and I), I performed at the Joyce Theater with the Ballet Hispanico dance company for their “Que Siga La Tradicion” show which was based on Gloria Estefan’s album at the time. I was a student at Ballet Hispanico for as long as I could remember. My life consisted of afternoons and weekends in dance class. There were no Saturday morning cartoons, no birthday parties and once I got into junior high school, spring break along any other breaks from schools became times for rehearsals. No, my mother was not a stage mom. Actually she was the complete opposite and hated when I got wind of an audition! She would hide them from me because if I couldn’t go away on vacation, she couldn’t either! Well, as you can see I have a lot of history with this dance company so when the opportunity came to watch them, I jumped on it and invited my mother.
Once we arrived at the Joyce theater I asked my mother how she felt about walking the same steps she walked with me 15 (or more) years ago when she was holding my dance bag and we would talk about how much I hated having brothers. Rocks have and show more feelings than my mother so her response was, “This is life! Imagine where you would be 15 years from now!” Well, thanks for getting mushy with me mom… Appreciate it.
We sat in our seats and the curtains came up. The show was great! My mom could not stop singing out loud and moving in her seat, to the point that I had to turn and tell her to settle down. There was one particular number where one of the dancers is as limp as a rag doll and performs this number on pointe. AHHHMAZING! Seriously, my mother and I could not take our eyes off of her. She was spectacular. To say that we enjoyed the show would be an understatement. My mother went home and called all her friends and family to tell them to purchase tickets. It is an absolute must see for everyone.

Fab Mama Finds!

Elle — Thu, 03 May 2012 17:29:35 +0000

I have to admit that the worst part of pregnancy isn’t the morning sickness, the painful pubic bone, the waddling, etc. It’s maternity shopping! What a freaking nightmare! I have a few pieces that I adore and was willing to splurge on but what happens when you just can’t splurge and still have the desire to look fabulous?
I’ve found a couple of items that cannot miss and have added them here for all you expecting mamas to check out. I hope you enjoy and I hope this little bit helps! Not all of us want every one of our tops to have a freaking bow across our bellies! Well, happy shopping and feel free to send over your fab mama finds and suggestions because this mama still needs some help too!

Isabella Oliver has a ton of cute stuff! Yes, it is on the pricey side but you can hold onto it if you plan on expanding your family OR you can sass it up and wear it post pregnancy because the items are that versatile!
Now, tell me you cannot wear this dress way after pregnancy AND it is only $159.00! I am sure you can wear this starting now and through the fall with dark tights and a long cardigan AND you can bring it out again next summer and throw on a pair of flip flops for a super casual day. AND! As if this little number doesn’t offer enough, it has buttons across the bust to make breast feeding mamas a lot more comfortable when they have to whip that thang out for feedings! Who said that all breastfeeding friendly clothing couldn’t also be fashionable? Not I!
This is a GREAT buy! So great that I bought it for myself (in two colors)!

Spandex! Give me Spandex! If you didn’t know about how fantastic Old Navy’s website is for maternity clothes, you know now! They have tons of trendy items at super cost effective prices and don’t forget all of their random sales and free shipping. Simply amazing! I have so many key pieces from them, my favorite being their full panel leggings. I have literally bought 6 pairs. I started with two and they are so comfortable and so versatile that I stocked up and purchased a few more. There is nothing better than wearing a pair of spandex pants and not have to worry about sucking your stomach in. It’s like heaven.
I adore this little number that they even took the time to put together for you to make your shopping experience even easier. It’s so fresh, so comfortable and a 100% HIT! You have your layers for the crazy hormones that make you hot one second and cold the other and you have the stylish cuteness that any fashionable mama will crave.

Oh Hey Honey Boo Boo child! Here comes Asos! Asos maternity line has been a god send with my pregnancy. I have ordered many pieces from them that I simply LOVE and so do the masses. They have super unique pieces that you really cannot find anywhere else.
I am the proud owner of the panther top which I wear with my flared jeans or even my spandex pants, the tulip dress, the double collar top that you will see on the left which is actually on sale now and SO CUTE on! I’ll stop listing my purchases and let you know that the quality of their clothing is optimal. I have not had issues with anything I have purchased. Washes well, fits well and looks fantabulous on. The only issue like Old Navy their clothes is only online so what I have learned to do is order everything in two sizes to guarantee I get the item in the right size. I have ordered in the size that I THINK I am and by the time the returning and purchasing happened, the items have been sold out. Total bummer. Either way, I strongly recommend them.

Lots of luck with your shopping ventures and once again, if you see any cuteness out there, please send it my way! God knows I will look pregnant for the next year or so and maternity clothes will be part of my life until at least December. So PLEASE send me your fab mama finds!

Ah… Push it! Push that Push Present!

Elle — Thu, 03 May 2012 16:39:35 +0000

I can count the number of weeks to my scheduled c-section on my two hands. That’s scary. I have not done a thing for this alien invader. Like, not a thing. I’m pretty sure it is because I don’t know the gender and somehow have psyched myself out to believe that I will be pregnant forever. However! I have had visions of my push present possibilities prancing in my head and to make timing even better The Bump put together a great selection today . Don’t judge and hold off on the hate mail because the way I see it is, yes, I gave life and yes that’s awesome but when someone gives you a gift, you send them some sort of thank you right? Well! I’m giving life so I feel I deserve a thank you as well and not in the form of flowers and chocolates but in the form of sparkle.

Things to do…

Elle — Wed, 28 Mar 2012 23:18:43 +0000

Oh, oh sometimes… I get a little queasy, yeah… I get so queasy that I end up throwing up on the floor, woah woah, I get a little queasy. What the hell is happening? Besides the sore pubic bone, achy back, migraine headaches, fainting spells, carpal tunnel and a partridge in a pear tree, this pregnancy has been pretty much smooth sailing. No morning sickness, no heartburn, a few food aversions but other than that, pretty normal. Pretty normal until yesterday that is. I woke up ready to throw up in someone’s face. Whoever wanted it just had to stand in front of me because I was ready to deliver. I also had a doctor’s appointment so I figured it was my nerves that I always get right before I see my doctor. No! Fail! I did everything in my power not to barf all over The Story of the Easter Bunny during bedtime, I even had the class to bring a barf bag to bed time, if that isn’t elegance, I don’t know what is.
So what the hell is going on. I’m 6 months deep into this and applying stretch mark cream at all hours of the day because of course, even though the creams never worked before, they TOTALLY will now and I get to add vomiting to my daily things to do? I thought my days of hovering over a toilet because of too much tequila were over as soon as I got knocked up with my first daughter. What the eff?! Please let this be a stomach bug.

When I grow up…

Elle — Fri, 23 Mar 2012 17:03:43 +0000

“When I grow up, I want to sell oranges by the highway… I want to bus tables, scrub floors and be that guy where no matter how effed up the weather is, I stand outside your fruit stand”. Don’t you remember wishing the same thing when you were growing up? The American dream? Ahh… To be able to work below minimum wage and have to go to work no matter what because I don’t have any job security or insurance… That will be the day.
It is 12:30 in the afternoon now and I have already been on the phone with THREE companies who outsource. That means THREE frustrating conversations that got absolutely NOWHERE. One company was in some island in the Caribbean and besides my getting my blood boiling by repeating the same exact thing to me over and over and over, the only other thing they did besides piss me off was really make me want jerk chicken. After my hours of, what the eff, I called my mother only for her to laugh at my imitation of each accent. Then I called my husband, he did the same. Then I had a bagel and a light bulb moment. How could Americans say that people who risk their lives and do not complain about the job options that they have are stealing jobs while huge corporations outsource? I know me personally, I would rather sit at a desk and deal with customer service issues than stand at a fruit stand. SO! Instead of focusing our energy on border wars, why not focus our energy on companies who outsource. Let’s get those jobs back first and then focus on giving Americans the chance to sell oranges on the highway.

Decisions… Decisions…

Elle — Wed, 07 Mar 2012 05:17:00 +0000

With this being our third rodeo, we have decided to make it a little different and not find out what we are having (or have we). I dragged my 18-20 hour a day working husband with me to look at baby bedding everywhere. While I knew that a quick phone call to my overbearing yet over loving mother would have 3 sets of baby bedding at my door, I wanted to do it myself this time. I wanted to choose every piece of this unisex nursery. I went everywhere searching for the RIGHT bedding. I was met with monkeys, rabbits, basketballs, ballerinas, insects, all things that I did not want. What if my baby does look like a monkey? What if it hates ballet or basketball? What if it looks like a mosquito? Too much room for error in my opinion. I’m not known for my gorgeous babies and cannot take any chances in this department. I searched the internet but as much as I fell in love was as much as I couldn’t touch or really get a feel of what I was getting. Why is it so hard to find a classic piece? All I want is my simple yet elegant taste shine. A baby is only baby once right? So why all the extra crap? When she decides that she wants a bedroom full of basketballs she will get it and when he decides that he wants to fill his room with frills and tutus, he will get it!
There is a store called Bambi Baby that has been around for as long as I can remember. I bought a lot of both my daughters’ layettes there. They have tons of timeless pieces there. Knit booties, smocked rompers, hand stitched pieces, everything my old-fashioned kind of girl soul desires. Now, if you are the type to take your baby out of the hospital wearing jeans that say “hot stuff” on the behind, then this is probably not where you’d want to go. All this time and I had never ventured to the upstairs since I never get past the first floor cuteness. This time I asked what they sold upstairs and the associate told me baby bedding and furniture! Say what?! Well, my bed ridden, pubic bone hurting, waddling behind went up those stairs to check it out. I walked around and looked at all the bedding and asked if they had anything else available besides what was on the floor. A gentlemen asked me exactly what I was looking for and I said, “Simple… Elegant… Not this..” Then he said the magic words, “We make custom bedding!”. There might just have been a light shining down on him and he directed me to the nicest and most patient woman ever! After about 3 weeks of annoying the crap out of her, changing the piping from off white, to white and then to the surprise color that I did choose. Then changing the bumper from a boxed bumper to a traditional bumper and then to a traditional bumper with ruffles. Poor woman right? Well! I finally felt confident enough to say YES today and officially put in my order. I can’t wait to see it all together and am more than pleased with the optimal service I received!
Now onto the window treatments…

Tips for booking a quiet flight!

Elle — Mon, 05 Mar 2012 18:03:43 +0000

You are going to be amazed! Do you want to know how NOT to book a flight and be near a screaming child? WELL! Here’s a tip for you! Book a charter! Fly Private! Other than that, have a seat and shut the hell up.
It is not because I’m a mother, I have always had an understanding that no human being would actually enjoy having their child cry anywhere, let alone a place as confined as an airplane. I became the advocate for those mothers and fathers a long time ago, WAY WAY before I ever had children because those people who turn their noses up and feel the need to say something to the already humiliated parent, annoy the shit out of me to say the least.
I’m sure that every adult in the world was a baby, then a child at one point in their life. Positive actually. Why complain? You know what is rude? Laying a huge fart while someone is behind you… You know what else is really rude? Reclining your freaking chair all the way back and not being considerate to the person sitting behind you or sitting beside two ADULTS who are having a heavy make out session. THAT is rude but to complain, shout, suck your teeth at a parent who is already struggling to shut this kid up is just being a bully.
You might think this is something that has personally happened to me, someone telling me to shut my kids up but it hasn’t. Not yet. I guess I never put the Karma out there as a single person without children. I never complained about kids. I just knew that they were just that, KIDS. So thankfully and I praise all Gods in the world, my girls have SO FAR been pretty quiet on flights. SO FAR!
So, as a heads up for the next time you are on a flight and want to get stupid on a baby, make sure I’m not on it because I will absolutely put you in your place and I can tell you that the Grand Marshall will not do a THING to me because I’ve stood up for those parents many, many times and will do it many, many times more.

Stressed out parents, you are welcome.

Bugawho?

Elle — Tue, 21 Feb 2012 17:19:29 +0000

A couple of years ago I posted about something odd that happens when you become a mother besides leaking boobs. There is something I like to call, stroller envy where you check out everyone else’s stroller just like some men check out and compare one another’s vehicles. It is insane but happens! I know I am not the only one!
I was lucky that when I went into my favorite baby store ever (Albee Baby) ready to purchase my Bugaboo in 2006, the stroller specialist told me to wait it out a little bit because Peg Perego was coming out with a new stroller that would be more convenient for me and my needs. I needed a stroller that would turn into a bassinet, I needed something that I could easily stick into the trunk of my car and I needed it to last at least 4 years. While the Bugaboo is a great stroller and by no means am I knocking it, it just didn’t work with my needs.
I went into a baby store yesterday to check out the Bugaboo Bee because it fit my current needs and I have a couple of friends who own it and LOVE it. I was okay with the stroller, I was able to face the baby, it has storage below the seat, is SUPER lightweight and if you get bored with the color or theme of your stroller, you can easily buy a new canopy and have a brand new look. Then I noticed I was comparing strollers on my lonesome. Where was my husband? I needed him there to make sure that the extendable handle bars worked with his height. I noticed a crowd about 10 feet away from me but didn’t pay it any mind and then gave my husband a call. He never just leaves without telling me where he is going so the odd behavior made me a little concerned that he tripped and was under a pile of pink and blue Gund teddy bears suffocating to his death (this is the way my brain works when I’m pregnant). Then I saw his head poking out the crowd and as I walked over, I saw my jock and Linsanity having husband demonstrating a stroller to the masses. ”I wonder if State Farm will insure this thing”, “It charges your iPhone!”, “It opens and closes by itself”, “It’s amazing!” he said. I swear to you that he probably urged 5 different couples to register for this thing and the thing I speak of is the Mamaroo Oragami by 4Moms stroller. I cannot even begin to describe it to you but you MUST see it for yourself. I would be fancy and post the video but lately, I’m too dumb to figure out how to post one. My sincere apologies! I posted it below for you to see for yourself! It really is the new MUST HAVE stroller that will leave everyone saying, “Bugawho?”.

Mamaroo Oragami Stroller

It’s a boy!

Elle — Tue, 21 Feb 2012 15:54:01 +0000

We had our big ultrasound yesterday and while we are very clear about NOT finding out what our baby is, I was certain that the ultrasound tech would spill the beans. My daughters were in the room and when the tech said, “okay, I’m going downtown so turn away or close your eyes” I was hoping my daughters would read or see what was on the screen! I mean, if my daughter could humiliate me in front of a police officer and ask what narcotics are because she read it on a sign at a pizzeria, I’m sure she can read, “Girl Parts”. No such luck, the girls were both into playing and could care less that there was a sonogram going on. Then, I waited for the ultrasound tech to say what I KNOW she’s going to say, “It’s a boy (insert pause), with a vagina!” I keep having this dream, over and over and over again. It’s a horrible dream. There I am, having my c-section and once the baby is out my doctor says that line.
My husband and I decided not to find out the gender of our baby this go around. I have to tell you the truth, it is super exciting! The first time around I knew that I HAD to know, the second, we decided not to find out but I made the mistake of taking my very controlling (yet SUPER lovable) mother to my appointment where she convinced me to find out and I don’t regret it. I was so happy that I was having another girl that instead of peeing in the cup after my appointment, I peed while holding the cup in my hand and saying, “My little Penelope is coming!”. I named my daughter Penelope by the way, not any of my personal body parts in case you were wondering. There was a point in my sonogram where I thought I was having a boy with elephantiasis on his schlong BUT that turned out to be the umbilical cord! WHOOPS! Everyone makes mistakes right? I’m thankful that everything looks good so far and that yesterday I got to “meet” a little alien who apparently likes to suck his/her thumb.